Directed by Michael Lembeck
Written by Lowell Ganz, Babaloo Mandel, Joshua Sternin, Jeffrey Ventimilia, Randi Mayem Singer
Starring Dwayne Johnson, Ashley Judd, Julie Andrews, Stephen Merchant, Ryan Sheckler
Release Date - January 22, 2010

When passing the poster for this film, a friend asked me “How did that get made?”  Well…sadly these movies make serious money.  The Game Plan cost 22 million to make and made almost 148 million worldwide.  Race to Witch Mountain cost 50 million (WTF?) and made 106 million.  Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson is actually a charismatic figure on screen but to date, the only thing I’ve liked him in was in 2003’s The Rundown.

Why does “family film” so often mean “let your kids have fun while the parents try to keep from gouging their own eyes out”?

Written and directed by James Cameron
Starring Sam Worthington, Zoe Saldana, Sigourney Weaver, Michelle Rodriguez, Giovanni Ribisi, Joel David Moore, CCH Pounder, Peter Mensah, Laz Alonso, Wes Studi, Stephen Lang, Matt Gerald
Rated PG-13 for violence, profanity, and brief alien nudity
Rating - 2 bullet holes

I apologize that this review is a month late.  I understand that everyone else has seen the movie but thought I should still weigh in on arguably the biggest spectacle of the last decade.

Everyone by now knows the plot.  In the year 2154, a mining corporation led by the ruthless Parker Selfridge (Giovanni Ribisi) wants to snag a load of - ahem - unobtainium from the planet Pandora.  Unobtainium is worth a fortune and desired so badly that military force is being used to drive out the natives (the Na’vi) who live in a giant tree atop this mineral deposit.  The military is led by the bloodthirsty Colonel Miles Quaritch (Stephen Lang) whose ace in the hole is Jake Sully (Sam Worthington), an ex-marine who is now paralyzed.   Sully’s twin brother was involved in a revolutionary experiment led by Dr. Grace Augustine (Sigourney Weaver) to have his genetic identity imprinted into the body of a Na’vi.  His brother has just been killed, and Sully is the only viable candidate to take his place.  His mission is to infiltrate the Na’vi and gain intelligence that will help Colonel Quaritch in his mission.

First of all, I will agree with the masses that this is a visually stunning film.  I am not at all a fan of 3D, but this is actually a film where 3D enhances the viewing experience.  I don’t think this film will work near as well in 2D on DVD.  Here, the 3D gives depth to the film which is necessary for the expansive, lush, jungle environment of Pandora.  We get very little of that 3D gimmickry with objects flying towards the audience.  And speaking fo 3D…in the year 2010, can we not get better 3D glasses?  At our screening, we were given these huge awful green plastic glasses with huge rims that only Carol Channing could love.  It made us all look like overgrown grasshoppers.  At one point, I looked around and the first thought that came to mind was My God, we look stupid.

Speaking of stupid, I want to get back to the story.  Avatar is exceedingly heavy-handed.  A planet named Pandora?  Not exactly subtle.  Then again, Cameron has never really been the subtle type.  But one of the worst blunders of the script is in the name of the mineral - unobtainium.  Unobtainium!!  The more I think about this, the angrier I get.  Yes, I know the film is an allegory, but we aren’t that stupid.  Or are we given the gargantuan box office numbers?  Unobtainium!!!  A sixth grader could have come up with a better mineral name.  Even worse, we are not told why unobtainium is wanted so badly or what the hell it is used for.  We just have to accept the fact that this is a mining operation worth killing over.  Deal with it.  Sorry, but that isn’t good enough.  We have to know what the stakes are for this story to work.

A good story needs a solid hero and villain.  A believable hero and villain.  Jake Sully works for me.  While his journey is far from original and offers pretty much nothing new in the whole knowing-your-enemy-and-becoming-one-of-them plotline, I believe in his compassion for the Na’vi and his fight for what is right.  Where the film took another huge misstep for me was with Colonel Miles Quaritch.  And I know the nerds will attack me for this since I’ve heard a lot of praise for Stephen Lang’s performance.  His performance is ok but it’s the script I have a problem with.  Lang is given so many cliched lines such as muttering “Let’s get this over with.  I want to be home for dinner.” before attempting genocide.  He comes across as cartoonish, and I just found myself laughing internally at him.  Again, I feel the heavy hand of Cameron “The guy is evil.  Accept it dammit!!”.  That was the biggest surprise to me, actually.  I have liked all of Cameron’s previous films and he has given us some memorable villains.  Not here.

I was actually bored with a large portion of Avatar.  I knew exactly where the story was going from the beginning.  There was not one surprise along the way.  None.  I’m not saying that I need a “wow!” or “aha!” moment every 15 minutes, but the story needs to engage me.  Because I knew where the story was going, all I could do was look at the pretty colors for 160 minutes.  The film has been compared to Dances With Wolves, and it’s a very valid comparison.  If you’ve seen that film,  you’ve seen Avatar.  I’d heard this accusation before going into the film and thought “Surely, it can’t be that obvious”.  Yeah.  It pretty much is.

The film isn’t without its merits.  In addition to the visuals which I appreciated, there is a good chemistry between Sully and Neytiri (Zoe Saldana), the daughter of the Na’vi chief who teaches Sully about their ways and falls in love with him.  I believed their relationship with each other and with the world around them.  With a better script, they could have had something even more special.  There are also some good battle scenes between the military and the Na’vi.  Cameron certainly has an eye for action, and it definitely is on full display here.  Speaking of action, here’s another chuckle I got from the film.  In a briefing, Colonel Quaritch discusses how the 10-12 foot tall Na’vi are designed physically and warns “They are very hard to kill”.  Yet later, we discover that a couple of bullets to the chest is pretty much all you need.

In all fairness, will a younger generation not familiar with Dances appreciate the story and be moved by it?  Possibly.  And that is cool.  But, I hope this isn’t seen as the gold standard for story-telling.  I fully realize I’m in the minority here.  The film is breaking box office records, winning awards, and garnering the acclaim of popular film critics that I respect.  To me, the film is a pile of dog shit wrapped in a pretty box made of unobtainium.

Directed by Brian Levant
Written by Jonathan Bernstein and  Jim Greer
Starring Jackie Chan, Madeline Carroll, Alina Foley, George Lopez, Billy Ray Cyrus, Amber Valletta, Katherine Boecher
Release Date - January 15, 2010

WTF

I have been an avid fan, viewer, and reader of Roger Ebert for years.  I believe he is the smartest and most well-rounded film critic to ever hold that position.  He is also an astonishing writer.  I don’t know how many people realize it, but he doesn’t only write about film.  I’ve read many columns in which he discusses evolution v creationism, politics, and just life in general.  He is the film critic that I aspire to be knowing full well I can never attain that level of skill.

I’ve sent him emails over the years, and he almost always replied.  He was always very kind and personable.  He is known to handle his own email.  He doesn’t reply to all of it, but if he does, it is from him, not staff.  In 2000, I was doing some freelancing for Relevant Magazine and emailed him to see if he would be interested in being interviewed for the topic I was wanting to write about.  He replied that he would love to but had some upcoming medical appointments and wasn’t sure when he would be free.  His schedule filled up, and the interview never happened.   In 2002, it was announced that he was battling thyroid cancer.  Over the next few years, he underwent several procedures that eventually left him unable to speak in 2007.

On his website Wednesday, Ebert announced that he can no longer eat or drink.  He gets nutrition but cannot ingest anything orally.  My heart breaks for the journey this guy is on, but I’m also amazed and encouraged by what is seemingly an undefeatable spirit in the man.  He seems undeterred by this latest prognosis.

The article is long but well worth the read.  This is probably not the Ebert that you think you know.  This is a man who, while unable to use his mouth, still is a rich wellspring of words.  This will make your day.

Written and directed by Peter and Michael Spierig
Starring Ethan Hawke, Willem Dafoe, Claudia Karvan, Michael Dorman, Vince Colosimo, Isabel Lucas, Sam Neill
Release Date - January 08, 2010

I know what you’re thinking.  Paul, you always dog on romantic comedies and give horror films a pass. I do.  And I don’t.  Case in point - this film.  It has an interesting premise - An unknown plague has transformed most humans into vampires.  So, vampires are rounding up and farming all humans for blood and researching a blood substitute.  Ethan Hawke plays a researcher working on such a solution when he is contacted by a convert group of vampires who have a shocking discovery that could possibly turn things around.

You’d think the vampire mythos had run its course and was running out of true blood.  But new takes keep popping up.  I just have a really bad feeling about this.  These days, it’s really hard to make a good vampire film.  The twin Spierig brothers previously made the 2003 Aussie horror film Undead which also had a good premise but just wasn’t executed well.  Something tells me Daybreakers won’t be screened for critics.

Directed by Anand Tucker
Written by Harry Elfont and Deborah Kaplan
Starring Amy Adams, Matthew Goode, Adam Scott, John Lithgow
Release Date - January 08, 2010

Mmmmm….what’s that putrid rotting smell?  We’re entering that magical time of year when the studios drag out the real trash that has been festering in their basements while their prized jewels have been in theaters for the past two months to make the Oscar cut.

When I saw the trailer for this film, I wanted to throw up.  Is there any genre more predictable, idiotic, and completely devoid of original thought as the romantic comedy?  The trailer for a film is crafted to pull audiences in.  I watched this thing dumbfounded.  Not only does it give away the entire plot (she goes overseas to snag her man but falls for a different one.  The End.), but it is unfunny, vapid, obtuse, misguided, and creatively bankrupt.

Written and directed by Scott Cooper
Starring Jeff Bridges, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Robert Duvall, Sarah Jane Morris, Colin Farrell
Rated R for profanity, brief sexuality
Rating - 1 bullet hole

Whiskey has been a thorn in your side
and it doesn’t forget
the highway that calls for your heart inside
- Ryan Bingham, “The Weary Kind” (title track of Crazy Heart)

Many joke about the maladies that befall the subject of a mournful country song, the poor bastard who loses his wife, his job, his car, his dog, and just about anything else that one can hold dear.  Crazy Heart deals with such a man but in a manner that completely avoids sentimentality and deals with such brokenness in a raw, unflinching honesty.

Jeff Bridges plays Bad Blake, a washed up country singer who now plays bowling alleys and other pitiful small venues.  He has bad marriages, a son, and his career left behind in a wake of alcohol, cigarette smoke, and bad choices.

In one small town, he meets a piano player whose daughter - Jean Craddock (Maggie Gyllenhaal) is trying to forge a journalism career and wants to interview Blake.  Blake agrees.  When Jean begins to dig beneath this craggy, hardened surface, the two begin to fall in love.  Jean has a four-year-old son who is the center of her life.  Her son is the same age as Blake’s son when Blake abandoned him.  He sees his chance at redemption and bonds with the boy.

Crazy Heart has some strong similarities to 1983’s Tender Mercies in which Robert Duvall played a similar character who bonds with a woman and her son.  Duvall won an Oscar for that role and also appears in Crazy Heart as Wayne, a recovering alcoholic and bartender who is a close friend of Blake’s.  If Duvall’s character were also an ex-musician, he could easily be playing Mac Sledge here.

In fact, it is this likeness not just to Tender Mercies but other countless stories that is the film’s biggest weakness.  We’ve seen this story before, and Crazy Heart doesn’t cover a lot of new ground from a plot standpoint.  I do, however, admire the conclusion of Blake’s story for reasons I obviously can’t get into.

The other big weakness of the film is Maggie Gyllenhaal.  To me, she seems terribly miscast.  Maybe it’s because I identify her so much with her numerous brooding and eccentric art-house roles she’s played in the past.  But, I believe it’s more than that.  She doesn’t exude that Southern charm that say an Ashley Judd would.  Whatever the case, I just don’t buy Jean as “real country”, a phrase that Bad Blake uses.

On the other hand, I was impressed with Colin Farrell as country singer Tommy Sweet, who is the current “hot young act” in the industry and who shares a past with Bad Blake.  Farrell’s Irish accent is completely absent, and I bought him as real country.

Of course, the star of the show is Jeff Bridges.  I am amazed with this man as an actor.  He makes every role look so damn easy.  He is Bad Blake.  After a while, I forgot I was watching Jeff Bridges.  You can smell the whiskey on his breath and the cigarette smoke on his clothes.  You see the pain of a wasted life on his face.  Despite his boozing and womanizing, Blake is an eminently likable guy.  As an audience, we want to hang out with him.  I imagine it’s because this is a movie about second chances.  Like I’ve said before about other great movies, its theme is universal.

I am not a country music fan.  I don’t hate it, it’s just not my style.  Yet, I loved the music in this film.  Much of the original music is written by Stephen Bruton and T-Bone Burnett.  Many of the songs are performed by Jeff Bridges, himself a musician.  It is all terrific.  In fact, as I write this review, I am listening to the title track.  This is a real musical treat.

Alcoholism is a frequent topic of country songs.  Many times, it is used as a punchline.  I loved how Crazy Heart tackles the issue head on.  Blake’s struggles take center stage and become a major plot point.  This is a sobering look at how devastating the addiction can be.

This is also Scott Cooper’s first feature which is astonishing.  We’ll be seeing more from him in the future.

Crazy Heart isn’t perfect but if you are moved by great performances, human drama, and soulful music, then make time for this one.