So, Oscar turned 81 Sunday night. Yes, I watched the show. I usually do. While I enjoy the spectacle of it (come on, there is always a chance that people will get drunk and say outrageous things or that Mickey Rourke will club someone to death in the crowd) and believe there is nothing inherently wrong with honoring those among you in the industry whom you believe have achieved perfection, I realize that it is still a spectacle. And there are plenty of things about Oscar that we hate. So let’s just jump into it.
Hypocrisy
When a lot of people think of Hollywood, the first word that comes to mind is “hypocrisy”. And it is usually in full bloom at the Oscars.
Until very recently, Academy voters - whether out of time constraints or pure laziness (my bet is on the latter) - did not see all of the films they vote on. It was not unheard of for a studio to only send out clips of their films that are nominated, so the Academy member can watch a few minutes of a movie with the actor/actress they are voting on. So, in an industry that prides itself on the public watching their films in their entirety, that campaigns against piracy, the actual Academy members weren’t watching the entire films? But as I said, this is no longer the case. It is still astonishing that this was common practice for so long.
But perhaps the best example of hypocrisy can be found in the omission of Brad Renfro from the In Memoriam segment last year. Brad Renfro died on January 15th, 2008. The “cutoff” to make the In Memoriam is Jan 31 of the same year the Oscars are broadcast. Renfro made the cut (not the kind of cut you want to make) but was never shown during this moving tribute to those who have fallen. The Academy’s excuse? “It is simply not possible to include everyone in that segment.” Really? In 3 1/2 damn hours, you can’t possibly squeeze in a pathetic 5 seconds to show Brad Renfro but you do have time to show us a picture of a gaffer no one ever heard of who died at 112 when his heart exploded while sneezing? I wasn’t a huge Renfro fan, but I believe in being fair. The Academy won’t admit this but there was a lot of buzz that they chose not to honor Renfro because of the manner of his death…since he died of a heroin and morhpine overdose. Because we all know that drugs are frowned upon and never tolerated in Hollywood. So…either way, Oscar, you are an asshole.
Politics
One of the biggest problems with the Academy is the politicization of it. Why do you think studios “campaign” the Academy “voters”? Most people know who Harvey Weinstein is…the former head of Miramax with his brother Bob. They now are co-chairs of The Weinstein Company, and Harvey has a reputation as kind of the Don Corleone of Oscar campaigning. At Miramax, he and his brother compiled an astonishing 249 Oscar nominations for their projects with 60 wins. They successfully secured Best Picture trophies for The English Patient (1996), Shakespeare in Love (1998) - famously upsetting Saving Private Ryan, and Chicago (2002). Most recently, Weinstein wanted The Reader rushed into theaters before the end of last year to make the cut for this year’s Oscars. Apparently, he put a horse’s head in director Stephen Daldry’s bed because it was released in time and was nominated for several awards including Best Picture. There are numerous nasty stories of the strong-arm tactics Harvey uses to secure these nominations. But, one can also argue that he is simply playing the ridiculous game whose rules he did not create.
Another common practice is for a film or actor to receive nominations/wins for reasons extraneous to merit. The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King won Best Picture in 2003 when many people knew it was more of a consolation prize for the entire trilogy when it could be argued that Mystic River was really the better film that year (Nerds, please don’t flame me. I agree that the Lord of the Rings trilogy is fantastic). This is just one of countless examples. But one thing I want to mention briefly…I’ve heard a lot of cynical people say before the telecast that “Heath Ledger will win the sympathy vote since he died”. Think about how stupid you sound when you say that (especially if you haven’t seen the movie). You come across as insensitive and uninformed. If you saw the film, you will know that Ledger did turn in an astonishing performance. He turned a famous comic book villain - played with gleeful relish previously by Jack Nicholson - into a disturbing psychopath who exuded pure evil. And no, the role did not do him psychological damage. That is a bullshit rumor started by complete morons in the media. Even if there was some pity in the voting, so what? The guy died way before his time but turned in a remarkable performance that has raised the bar in the comic book genre. Let it go.
Pretentious
There is a disturbing, almost masturbatory, nature to the Oscars. I’m all for saluting and rewarding the high achievers in your ilk but come on. How many of us watch the ceremonies and shrink in embarrassment when someone gushes about the “sanctity of their craft” or some other phrase dripping with pretension? Sunday night, Marion Cotillard was paying tribute to Kate Winslet and at the end, she gushed a breathless “thank you” as if Kate had cured cancer. I think Kate Winslet is an enormous talent, but these kinds of histrionics are really hard to take. When Daniel Craig was discussing costume (and this isn’t his fault since he is only speaking the lines give to him), he said “Color…do bright ones camouflage a dark soul?” It was at that time that I threw up in my mouth a little bit.
Format
Okay the show is just too damn long. Every year, the producers of the telecast say it should be “at or around 3 hours” and it almost always goes 3 and 1/2 hours. One improvement they’ve made is at cutting short the Original Song performances. We don’t need to hear the entire song unless Bruce Springsteen is performing “The Wrestler”, but you somehow omitted him and instead chose to cut down the number of nominated songs from 5 to 3 but keep up the idiotic tradition of nominating more than one song per movie. Seriously, did Travis the Chimp choose the nominations for this category? But I digress.
I actually had hope during the night when after an hour and a half, we had blown through a very large majority of awards. But then, the brakes were applied and the fluff exploded through the cracks as segments dragged on too long. I’m not going to talk about the specific changes that need to be made. Oscar, just cut it shorter. Please. Those speeches…sheesh. Award winners…we really are happy for you, but you don’t have to name every single bastard that helped you.
Speaking of going too long, I need to wrap this up. Look, this is the most important thing you need to remember - If your movie didn’t get much love last night, so what? You don’t need Oscar for your personal validation. Watch what you want to watch and don’t get caught up in what the Academy prefers. I was a huge fan of The Wrestler and would have loved to see Rourke get that statuette. But Sean Penn was very deserving as well (even if political inclinations incluenced his win). I’ll get The Wrestler on DVD, and I’ll be fine.
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